Knowing how to give, ask, and receive: the balance in our relationships

Knowing how to give, ask, and receive: the balance in our relationships

Imagine the last time someone offered you help. Did you accept it immediately, or did you hesitate for a moment? Sometimes, the simplest things are the most complex. Giving, asking, and receiving are actions that are part of our daily lives, but how often do we do them consciously? How often do we reflect on how these simple actions shape our relationships and our connection with others?

These concepts, although basic, are the key to building solid bonds based on empathy, gratitude, and mutual respect. However, finding balance among them is not always easy. In this article, we will explore how to develop these skills and how they can transform the way we relate to the world.

Knowing how to give: the generosity that builds

Giving doesn’t just mean offering something material; it also involves time, attention, and support. It can be as simple as listening to a friend during a crisis or dedicating an hour to teach a skill to someone in need.

When you give, do it genuinely, without expectations. If you ask yourself, "Why am I giving?" make sure the answer does not depend on the other person’s reaction.

Giving also reflects the kind of world we want to create. Every small act of generosity contributes to a virtuous cycle that, sooner or later, comes back to us.

Knowing how to ask: the value of vulnerability

Asking can be even more difficult than giving. It requires humility, courage, and the ability to recognize our needs. Many times, we avoid asking for help out of fear of rejection or appearing weak, but the truth is that asking is also a way to build bridges with others.

Not all reasons for asking are the same. Some ask out of genuine need, while others take advantage of the generosity of those around them. This is why learning to ask with clarity and honesty is essential. The way we ask says a lot about our intentions and our respect for others’ time, energy, and resources.

Asking also challenges our ego. Often, this is the biggest obstacle, as we associate asking with showing vulnerability or dependence. However, true humility doesn’t lie in hiding our needs but in having the courage to acknowledge and communicate them. Asking doesn’t mean admitting defeat or showing weakness; it means demonstrating that we are strong enough to accept that we can’t always do everything alone.

Asking is not about appearing vulnerable; it’s about having the courage to recognize that, as humans, we need others. This recognition brings us closer to those around us and, far from weakening our relationships, strengthens them.

When we ask authentically and humbly, we not only get the support we need but also create opportunities for others to feel useful and valued. It’s a mutual exchange that benefits both parties and reminds us that, at the end of the day, we are part of an interdependent community.

Knowing how to receive: gratitude that connects

Accepting what others give us is not always easy. Sometimes, we struggle to receive because we think it makes us look needy or because we believe we don’t deserve it. However, knowing how to receive is just as important as knowing how to give and ask. And when we receive, we must do so with empathy, understanding that people often offer what they have, even if it’s little, and they do it from the heart.

Receiving with empathy means valuing the gesture beyond the material. It doesn’t matter if what we’re given is big or small, perfect or imperfect; the important thing is recognizing the intention behind the act. Many people give from their scarcity, offering what they can without expecting anything in return, and that is a gift that deserves to be received with warmth.

Those who give are not obligated to do so. It is a gesture of generosity and kindness, a choice made because they value their connection with us. For this reason, when we receive, we must do so with gratitude and respect, showing appreciation not just for the object or action but also for the intention behind it.

Being grateful also means being aware that we won’t always receive perfect or ideal things. There will be times when what is offered may not be useful, necessary, or even pleasant. In those cases, the key is to receive politely, express thanks, and, if necessary, set aside what doesn’t serve us without dismissing or judging the giver. This approach prevents misunderstandings and keeps relationships rooted in mutual respect.

When you receive something—be it an object, a compliment, or a gesture of help—take a moment to express your gratitude. A simple and sincere "thank you" can have a positive impact on the other person.

The balance between giving, asking, and receiving

The balance between giving, asking, and receiving not only transforms our relationships but also profoundly impacts our personal growth. These three human pillars, when understood and practiced consciously, help us live more fully, connected, and meaningfully.

First, giving teaches us generosity and empathy. It’s an opportunity to move away from selfishness and connect with others from a genuine place. But it also invites us to reflect on how and why we give, helping us become more aware of our actions and their intentions. Giving not only benefits the recipient but also fills us with satisfaction and purpose.

Secondly, asking confronts us with our vulnerability, and therein lies its power. Learning to ask teaches us humility and frees us from the mistaken idea that we must do everything alone. Recognizing that we need others doesn’t make us weaker—it makes us more human. This act of trust not only strengthens our relationships but also helps us build a support network that propels us to grow.

Finally, receiving challenges us to be grateful and open. It reminds us that we cannot control everything, that sometimes what we need comes in unexpected ways, and that accepting with gratitude what is offered, even if imperfect, is a life lesson. Receiving with empathy helps us value the intentions behind the gestures and build deeper and more meaningful relationships.

When we integrate these three aspects into our lives, our relationships improve because we become more aware of our own needs and those of others. By balancing giving, asking, and receiving, we become more attentive, grateful, and connected—not only with those around us but also with ourselves. This balance allows us to be better companions, friends, and human beings.

Practical tips:

  • Take a few minutes at the end of the day to reflect on these three pillars.
  • Keep a small gratitude journal to note specific moments of giving, asking, and receiving.
  • Consciously and meaningfully practice saying "thank you" and "please."
  • Establish a small daily ritual to practice one of these aspects (e.g., offering help to someone every morning).

Remember, we all need to function under these three pillars. It is in this constant interaction that we find not only the key to improving our relationships but also the opportunity to grow as individuals. Practice this balance, and you’ll discover how every gesture, no matter how small, can transform your life and the lives of those around you.

Conclusion

Giving, asking, and receiving are actions that, while ordinary, hold immense richness when viewed through the lens of personal growth. This balance isn’t achieved overnight. It requires constant introspection and practice. It’s about observing our relationships more closely: Are we giving out of obligation or because we genuinely want to? Are we asking out of authentic need or convenience? Are we receiving with gratitude or judgment? Each time we reflect on these questions, we take a step forward in our growth.

It’s important to remember that this balance is also dynamic, not rigid. There will be times in life when we give more and others when we need to ask or learn to receive with greater openness. And that’s okay because we are constantly evolving. The key is to remain aware of our actions and how they influence our inner peace and our relationships.

By living from this balance, we not only improve our interactions with others but also transform ourselves on a personal level. We learn to let go of selfishness, shame, or pride that often hold us back, allowing ourselves to experience life from a place of greater connection, peace, and happiness.

Finally, let’s not forget that we are all part of a larger circle. Every time we give, ask, or receive with intention, we contribute to creating a more human, empathetic, and conscious environment. That is the true power of living in this balance: not only transforming ourselves but also inspiring others to do the same.


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